Crazy Pictures from the Cruise:

Ben loved Manjo's (the magician) dinner tricks.

How'd it get in his mouth?

Taking it seriously.

My living space for the week.

I was top left. How'd I monkey up there? Hop on to Rachel's bed, then use the skills I learned in gymnastics when I was six. Later, we found the ladders.

Cruise: Day Three - Beach at Ensanada

Thurm's head

Action Thurm

Save the Glasses

Cry Face is a combination of salt/sand/sunscreen wiggling into my peepers.

My Favs

Cruise: Day Three - Ensenada

Lovin' the bus ride.

Viewpoint

Waiting for the elusive blowhole.

Never snapped a decent shot, so here's a small vid, too bad it wasn't one of the amazing blasts.

Me, Ben, Blowhole

Ben's brother Thurm, sister-in-law Natalie

Can't get over how cute every single one of their pictures is.

Ben's Ensenada Souvenir

Cruise: Day Three - Ensenada

Our day begins:

So happy.

Touchy.

Cruise: Day Two - Catalina Island

View from our tender boat.

Goldilocks

First couple to parasail. I was very nervous.

View of Catalina Island from a parasailer's perspective.

These bottle nosed dolphins were jumping like crazy. Ben and I got to see them from above; it was so fabulous to watch them jump and dive and spin. We got to see their white underbellies, and we even saw two twisty turny seals.

This was by far one of my favorite parts of the entire trip.

Sea Kayaking

My digital camera's first plunge in to the water during our sea kayaking adventure.

We weren't sure what it was going to capture; we couldn't see these guys very well from our kayak.

Ready to snorkel (imagine my bright blue flippers).

I walked backwards in to the water, and walked backwards out of the water when I was done. Ben's brother-in-law Mark thought this was beyond hilarious.

I just thought it was efficient.

Mr. Ben

Don't mean to be so dramatic about holding my breath.

Nat and Thurm (adorable even while snorkeling)

Ben's brother Anth aka Snorkel Angel

Ben

My tribute to Karli

Mexican Cruise - Day One

Ben worked with his brother-in-law to set up the ultimate family surprise. Ben got leave, invited me along, and jumped out on the cruise ship and surprised his family. I cried like a baby, realized no one in the family was crying, then felt very sheepish.

Ben was so impressed.

Lobby.

The ship was so detailed.

I loved watching the elevator crawl up and down with its blue eggs.

First DinDin

I got so tired of people walking around in their robes.

This lady was the craziest of the crazies at Karaoke. She had her robe half on when she started to perform her tribute to Michael Jackson, but she was told she had to put it back on, she sauntered off for a second with a, "I should have known," drawl. During her dance, she turned her back on us, undid her robe, and started to shake and shimmy while we all screamed, "Put it back on!"

Ben and Thurm busting out Ice Ice Baby.

Nothing ruins a good soak in the tub like a pervert spider.

I was patiently standing in line at TJMaxx, waiting to return something for Em. I was called to the register, explained my situation, and waited for the huffy teenager to complete the transaction. From behind me came a,

"Excuse me? Excuse me? Is there a man that works here?"

An older lady was calling out to the cashier, but I was the only one who heard. The lady called out again, and the cashier was very confused, as was I.

Then the flustered lady confessed:

"There's a praying mantis back on the plates in the kitchenware. You know? The bug that pinches? I think you better have a man get it; it's big!" To emphasize her point, she both pinched and swung her arms out real wide at the appropriate moments.

I laughed, the lady smiled, and the cashier was still oblivious.

I regret not going back to see this huge praying mantis.

Please be my Gym Buddy

• lunges around the 3/4 of the perimeter of the gym combined with shoulder presses
• last 1/4 up the lunges to bouncing lunges
• bike on a level that feels like you can't even push it down until you finally get it spinning for one minute as fast you can, immediately jump off and do a set of 12 shoulder raises (repeat this process two more times)
• run up and down the stairs as fast you can for one min, immediately do 10 squat jumps (think of a frog bending down touching the ground, then jumping straight up as high as he can, smoothly going straight back into squatting and touching the ground), then a set of twelve shoulder lifts (arms straight out in front of your body), repeat this process three more times
• feel like you're going to fall down the stairs because your quads are so wobbly and tight
• talk yourself into not puking
• get dizzy
• sweat like a logger
• finish and grab a yoga mat, and pretend to stretch
• close your eyes, camp out, get scared to be able to stand up again
• swear off working out
• convince yourself that you have to run at least two miles on the treadmill (you've got your new Bon Iver purchase to sweeten this idea)
• stumble into the pitch black Cardio Cinema, use your ipod as a flashlight so you don't bang into the ellipticals
• start entering info on the treadmill, look around, no one's around, not too bad
• look up at the screen and realize this is an older movie ... with Gizmo!
• literally run out of there, terrified and mad

Dear Gym Buddy,

If you were with me, I wouldn't have been so scared of Gremlins because I wouldn't have been alone in the dark.

Visit soon,

Sweaty Belly

So many things to tell you ...

Here's a list:

• teacher "pretended" to flip off our pricipal during one of our meetings
• news crew almost interviewed me at school
• my Back-to-School Night handouts had my e-mail as amy.batman
• being in charge of the 7th grade team of teachers gives me an ulcer. Think: Pure chaos.
• my student teacher always says, "By all means."
• exhausted one night, people downstairs were being so loud, so I yelled out my window at them, then went downstairs and told a boy to turn down his music because it was shaking my bed. Then I couldn't sleep due to stress about how now everyone probably thought I'm a b.
• Abe's 1st bday party: Eli threw his wolf over the fence, it landed in their neighbor's poo-ridden garden, Eli was very worried, but Zach saved the day. Ezra stuffed two grapes in his mouth to imitate a monkey, then started muffle screaming that he couldn't bite, got very panicked, so I hooked my finger in his mouth and popped out a grape, then we both laughed really hard.
• went to dindin with Zach and his Em, oh and Toby, Em was peeking around our booth right as a guy walked up ... you'll have to ask her for the details
• my Em had a 9 out of 10 first week of college. Last time I talked to her, as we were talking, she fell off of her bed and in to her garbage
• boy's downstairs' basement flooded: sewer pipe broke, poo water everywhere. They drug everything that got ruined out front, and people kept coming to take it, the couch was very popular. Whenever we saw someone out there, we would try to run out and warn them. All of Ammon's poo-riddled shoes got taken. So gross.
• One roommate made out with her custodian and now is super embarrassed

Amazing.

Fake though, right?

See more funny videos and TBT Videos at Today's Big Thing.

Emily's friend Karli put together this video.

I want everyone to see it, not to embarrass Emily, but to see why we adore her.

She's got spunk, humor, courage, killer dance moves ...

Now I understand why every time we were bored, she would suggest we could make a movie. Apparently, she and her buds did this a lot.

This is Emily. from Karli Davies on Vimeo.

Another Post about my Hair

Before:

After:

When Jackie was telling me how much she loved it, Ezra piped in that he loves it too. I told him it also smelled really good. He said, "Yum! Smells like cheetos!"

My parents left on Thursday for their Alaskan cruise.

I shake my head; I am so

jealous. My dad was constantly on the computer looking at their route and

researching the different cities. Typical. They get to go on a helicopter ride, halibut fishing, whale

watching ...

Right before they went, my

dad went crazy telling me the most obvious things about keeping the house

together.

Examples:

• He'd open the cupboard under the kitchen sink, "Now, if this garbage gets full, take it out."
• Pointing upstairs, "Turn on the swamp cooler now and then ... but only if you're hot. Make sure the windows are open to get the air moving, but don't open them all the way."
• Him: "Turn on the dishwasher." Me: "Right now?" Him: "No, but when it gets full, turn it on."

This just came from my mom's iPhone; I love how savvy she is with technology:

I came home to SLC last night to water our pathetic lawn (our landlord called and is not happy about it). My neighbor, Thomas, was out working on his car. We talked and talked and then he asked me if I'd seen the fliers about the guy who's been breaking in to houses on our block. Terror raced through my body because I already knew that no one else was home. Apparently, there's a 300 lb guy who just walks in to people's houses, and one girl woke up at night to find him crouching at the end of her bed watching her. She screamed for him to get out, and he slowly hefted his weight out of there. The police haven't been able to find him, but say that they couldn't really do anything anyway because he hasn't stolen anything or hurt anyone. I made Thomas walk through my house with me, my heart would race every time I got to a spot where a huge guy really could hide. Later, after reading about 80 pages before getting even kind of sleepy, I decided if I woke up in the night, I would force myself not to look at the end of my bed. I felt safe with all of my doors locked, but I still can't stop my brain from conjuring up sticky situations. Thomas laughed when I told him, "Yeah, maybe the guy hasn't done anything yet, but I will be the someone who has something happen." I wasn't trying to be funny.

Can't get enough of my iGoogle Tea House theme

Things I've caught my Mister Fox at:

• fishing (both from his boat and while sitting on the bank)
• doing his laundry
• having breakfast
• feeding the ducks
• looking at the stars through his telescope

Good one Dave.

Missing my man, he knew all of the words and the sweet moves.

You'll never guess what I've done.

I went and bought myself a laptop!

Just this morning, I was conversing with my mother about how I would really like to purchase my very own laptop, seeing how I might be taking on a student teacher, while he's bumbling up there in front of the kids, I can be in the corner typing up lesson plans (or watching Arrested Development on hulu.com). It's time I really truly did grow up.

After pleading with my mom to shop with me once they get back from their Alaskan cruise, I road tripped to Logan with Dra and my dad. Dra took a math placement test and got 95 out of 100! (She should be a teacher and come teach side by side with me, we'd be the best team.)

Well, before Dra took off to rock her test, what do we find on sale at the USU bookstore? A MacBook. So cute, so perfect. $849 for the MacBook, which comes with a hp printer, and an ipod. I was scared by it all just because it seemed so fabulous. Too fabulous? I told Dra and my dad that I needed to think about it, I would decide when Dra was done with her test. I texted my mom, asking her if I should buy it, and she immediately wrote back, "Heck yes!!!" That sealed the deal, and here I am typing my very first e-mail on my very first laptop on my very first blog.

Unfortunately, to get the screaming deal, you had to be a student, so we

pretended that it was for Dra, but that I was paying for it. I felt like a ventriloquist.

Salesman to Dra: What color of ipod would you like?

Dra to me: I don't know, hmm, what do you think?

Me: I don't know, would you mind if I looked at them both?

and on and on and on with all of his questions. Dra and I did pretty good, but it had to be painfully obvious that everything was for me.

I got an Ipod Classic, it's a whopping 120GB! What am I going to do with all of that space? I can finally watch the Beyonce Singles Ladies music video that I accidentally bought.

Please meet my new walls, you can call them Flotsam and Jetsam

My lamp is supposed to be crooked, it adds style.

On another note, Dra and I had the privilege of attending a birthday party that consisted of a huge slip n slide in the park. Picture a long row of tarps staked together, a water hose and lots of dish soap. It was the best time of my life. Dra even got hit in the head with a inflatable turtle, still not sure why the kid threw it at her but I'm so glad he did.

I'm off to Logan again with Dra and my Dad so that Dra can take her precious math test. Guaranteed I'll fall asleep in the car like last time but just turn my head to make it look like I'm really looking out the window. That'll do the trick. Dra can keep Dad entertained.

Quote of the Day:

"Yeah, or like when you're looking and it splashes you in the face?"

I am pleased to introduce you to my very first plant.
He is a Money Tree, and you may call him Templeton.

I am also pleased to let you know that I am still quite a hit with the old men. My roommate Karen got to witness this last run-in, and while she was laughing and loving every minute, I could feel the sweat pooling under my little armpits. I need to take a picture of the shirt that got me into this whole mess before I divulge. (As I re-read this part, I worried that you would think that I was wearing an immodest diddy, but it was far from immodest, just be patient, and you will understand.)