Stupid sexy templates.

Thank you Rose for letting me know about the blog mishap.

I have stories galore, but do I have the patience to recall and type?

Maybe I'll soothe everyone's jangled nerves from my lack of posts with a quick outline of recent events, and maybe I'll detail one quick story.

1. 1st place in my first ever 5k.

2. Witnessed Beckham bend it ... like Beckham.

3. Cheered Thurm and Ben on at the Salt Lake Marathon.

4. Slacklined for the first time; hopefully I'll get better.

5. Held an extremely successful Biggest Loser party. Attendees: Me, Ben, and Emily

6. Received half a smile from my dad when he noticed that part of his birthday present included a whoopy cushion.

7. Desperate to attend the Sasquatch concert this year. Anyone want to carpool? Please?

8. Attended the National Council of Teachers of Mathematics conference. It was held here in Salt Lake. Took stalker pictures of a man wearing a bright blue cape. Yes, cape. I don't know why I'm continually surprised at the weirdos I meet at these things.

9. Croquet/Bocce to the max lately. Kudos to Ben for beating me in both last night.

Details about my 5k:

My school had been advertising a fundraising 5k for so long, and I had continually talked to my students about how much fun it was going to be, and how important it was to raise money for our school. I talked to my friends and did my part to help promote the shindig. Ben and his roommate Kyle were definitely willing to participate, and I was secretly nervous to run, but so excited to be a part of the fun.

Well ... dun dun dun. When it came down to it, I couldn't participate because I was going to be at the NCTM conference in Salt Lake. Why not just skip out, you ask? Well, my way into the conference had been paid, and it was close to $700, and I would have felt way too guilty to sneak out. Plus, I had to volunteer on one of the days so I felt like I missed out on a whole day's worth of classes.

When I volunteered I got bumped up to "Floor Leader," watch out! I got a walkie-talkie, and I just roamed checking on the other volunteers. I walked and walked, and soon was cursing my choice of boots. The walkie-talkies were fun, but it really red-flagged me as someone of importance, and I had to help a lot o' people. It was scary at first because I didn't have a clue where certain rooms were. I walked a lot of people to their classes, faking like I knew the way, but really frantically checking until I found it. I was a great faker. Soon enough I had walked around so much that I knew exactly what to do and where to go. I had two crazy ladies, and only one cool walkie-talkie exchange.

Crazy Lady Number One: "Where are they serving us lunch?"

Me: "There are vendors all around the Salt Palace, and there are quite a few restaurants just outside."

Crazy Lady: "No. Where will they set up to feed us?"

Me: "They won't be feeding us lunch," thinking, "Are you serious? You think they're going to feed over 10,000 people?"

Crazy Lady: "I heard they're going to feed us in the ballroom. You know, where they fed us breakfast?"

Me: "Nope, there are classes going on in the ballroom," again thinking, "Where the heck is she getting all of this?"

Crazy Lady Number Two was absolutely furious when she came waddling up to me. I found myself putting my hand on my walkie-talkie not un-like it was a pistol needing to be drawn. Crazy Lady Number Two: "Where is room 101 A?"

Me: "Oh, it is actually downstairs, the way that you were coming from. Unfortunately, you're going the wrong direction, but I am more than happy to walk you to the class."

Crazy Lady Number Two: "I cannot walk anymore!" I nearly shielded my sensitive ears, she was so loud.

Not really knowing what to do, I repeated myself, with a courteous smile, and she went off about how someone had told her to come upstairs ... I walked away. Shrug, she was being unreasonable, and I wasn't able to help her.

Anyway, this was about the 5k right? Ben tried to convince me to stay home and run with them, but I would have felt so snakelike in a way. He pointed out that I could still pay the entrance fee, get a shirt, and still support the school. Good thinking. So I gave him my money, and he paid for two people. He explained to the people manning the booth how I wanted to run, but I had to be at my conference, and they cooed, "We love Ms. Bateman ... yada yada yada."

Ben called me a little after he had finished, and I was asking him how he did and such, and he pointed out that it was a little loud because they were about to announce the winners. Ben started laughing, his deep, completely humored, straight from the belly, (my favorite) laugh. I didn't understand. He kept laughing, and then let me know that they just announced 1st place for the girls: Amy Bateman! to which the entire crowd erupted into cheers and claps.

I still didn't understand.

Then Ben's roommate Kyle shook his head with, "You didn't do what I think you did?" Oh no, Ben had run with my number on ... We had a grand ol' laugh, but I was nervous about the consequences. Ben didn't want to say anything because it would disrupt all of the prizes. I didn't want to receive a reward on Monday for a race that I wasn't even at.

To Ben's credit, when he and Kyle got back to his car and checked the other number, the booth people had written my name on both numbers.

On Monday, I only had one student say anything, "Ms. Bateman, you won something at the race!" And when they were announcing winners over the intercom, I seriously almost started sweating. I sent one of my teacher buddies a message about how nervous I was, but she laughed it off with, "Don't worry, I already told Jan (our principal) all about it."