He is a Money Tree, and you may call him Templeton.
I am also pleased to let you know that I am still quite a hit with the old men. My roommate Karen got to witness this last run-in, and while she was laughing and loving every minute, I could feel the sweat pooling under my little armpits. I need to take a picture of the shirt that got me into this whole mess before I divulge. (As I re-read this part, I worried that you would think that I was wearing an immodest diddy, but it was far from immodest, just be patient, and you will understand.)