Thursday, June 12, 2008

1. For over a week, I've been driving past the mouth of Big Cottonwood Canyon. My heart saddened every time I'd get close to the mine because there was a lonely carcass of something super soft. It had to be some sort of mountain cat. It was lying on its side with its tail kind of sticking out. I drove past it time and time again, each time super tempted to pull over and check it out. Was it a cougar? Mountain lion? Are those the same thing? I was nervous that it would do some mental damage to see the poor thing, so I always kept driving, shaking my head with pure pity.
Last night, I'd had enough of the wondering. Poor little guy, shouldn't someone have taken care of the body already? My curiousity led the way, noticing that there weren't any cars behind me, I slowed to a crawl, pulled over slightly ... and gasp! It was a rug. A super soft rug. Joke's on me, I guess.

2. Ammon came running into my apartment this morning, desperately hoping that I had seen his keys. Deflated, he ran back downstairs to continue his search. A minute later, he opened my front door, and yelled up, "Amy! You're getting a ticket! Run out here quick and stop her!"
I bolted out and met a tiny old lady, and asked her what the problem was. She pointed to the no parking sign, to which I explained that we could park in front of that pole, and I swept the extra five feet that I had given the pole.
"What about having a parking permit?" she clucked snottily.
I pointed my finger to the permit that was lying in the back window of my car.
"Hmmph, well I didn't see it," and she continued to write the ticket!
"So everything's alright?" with my eyebrows furrowed, completely confused and annoyed.
"Can I see the permit?" she spat.
I didn't have my keys on me, so I excused myself and sprinted inside and back out. When I came back out, she was on the phone with the parking pass office. I handed her the permit as she was saying, "Alright, thank you, then I will continue issuing the citation." She asked if I lived at the house because the office told her that I did. "Then this guest permit doesn't apply to you because you live here."
"I have used this permit for two years, and I have never had a problem. AND the lady in the office told us that this is what we were supposed to do. Excuse me for being frustrated, but I did my part to make sure that I had the correct parking pass, and this is what they issed to us. It seems like there's a problem with the office, not with my parking pass, seeing as this is the one they told us to use."
"Hmmph. Would you like to talk to the office?"
So insanely frustrated at this point, I took the lady's cell phone, and explained my situation. The parking pass lady kept on with, "Well I don't know who would have told you that, do you have a name?" It was two years ago! I begged her to let me have a warning, but then asked what I was supposed to do about a parking pass if this wouldn't work, to which she had no reply.
"So am I going to have to plan on getting a ticket every single day because my pass doesn't "apply"?"
"Oh, we have nothing to do with the tickets."
"Oh, because I just overheard this lady say that she had your permission to continue issuing the citation."

"So you're going to write me a ticket for not having a parking pass, when you're holding the parking pass in your hand?"
Horse shit.
Later, I called Karen (my roommate) and she fumed with me, because we were together when we got the permits. She's going to call the parking pass office again.

3. Emily and I were out longboarding around the neighborhood, when a car stopped to ask her something. She was a ways behind me; stranger danger. So I jumped off my board and evil-eyed the car the whole time. Nobody kidnaps my sister. The car moved on and talked to a couple that was out walking, and Em came running over explaining that the lady was looking for her little black dog. Classic kidnap line. However, there is a huge poster at the bottom of my parent's hill that announces "Found: Black Dog."
So with Em's encouragement, I stopped the car and explained the directions to the poster.
"Well ... he's only been gone 15 minutes. I was playing with my grandkid's ... and he just bolted." So I gently explained that that poster didn't apply to her because it had been up a few days. I asked if the dog had a collar with a number, and assured her that we would keep a look-out, and we'd call her.
I had barely finished my sentence when, "Oh! There he is!" and she gunned her little green car, barely missing running over my longboard. Em and I both looked up in surprise to see a little scotty dog running across the road up ahead.
We boarded our little hearts out to help the lady catch him, but he hopped right into the car like a good boy.


Emily said...

That's right you got my back! big time.

Natalie said...

Poor rug!

Thurm & I were both pissed after reading about your parking ticket. Seriously, people need to use their brains.

Tenille said...

How frustrating! So...did you get a ticket or not?

Amy Bateman said...

Yes, I got a $20 ticket. I realize that that's not that much money, but I'm absolutely broke at the moment, and it's the biggest waste of my dear little dollars.